We've made it, & with candied "Gummis' on top.
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It has been six months since we met them, and found ourselves with two more children added and blessed into our humbled family. We Celebrated "Gotcha day" with Scott and Athena and the rest of the brood at Golden Corral this evening.
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Things are going great as a family.
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Can you believe I can say that:o) ...after the torture of months #'d three and four... I remember dreading the social workers unexpected visit during month 3 ...knowing I did not want to see her for at least another couple months, we needed more time to be family. (At least wait until the 6 month mark, I kept thinking as she made plans to arrive that day.) I knew I just was not up to seeing her and thinking I sure wish the behavioral issues had subsided... like what? [you ask]...crawling on the floor like a dog at school and home, hitting a girl at school, complaining about everything (especially food), always last, bossy, manipulative, controlling, dominating, walking yards ahead of group, talking in Chinese with curse words and name calling to 'Chinese' siblings, not respecting any female.
...But then really, BAM! at 4.5 months it was so much better. He finally 'cracked' ~ cried (grieved, if that is what it was) and has been able to hug, more than just at bedtime and take, tolerate (LOL) cheek kisses... he still does not kiss, but he does hug and for a preteen boy that is awesome. ;-) and he can now be nice and concerned for his siblings feelings, and respects a women or girls in general as people not personal servitudes. So he has stopped bossing and controlling most (LOL) situations. I say, we have finally 'hit-pay-dirt' with him and now we are truly feeling family. It was hard those month right after the initial two month 'honeymoon phase' that a family typically sees in adoption. But now we know it is not a honeymoon period, it 'IS' the real bond that grew, a little slower with an older boy. But love all the same.
Our girls though, 'easier' is such a simple way to put it. They honeymoon'ed and never looked back, I guess that was good since we needed that little extra effort & time for our son to come around. Today we are at 6 months, with our two newest and our two oldest children [all in the same, adopted out of birth order] and wow, it feels good. Better, Relaxed and Family like. Wheewhhh!
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Whelp, we made it. :-) our Social worker is actually joining us again {3rd visit in 6 months} and this one we are open armed at feeling content and relaxed with. She will be at our court date in April, and she will do our six months post adoption at dinner that evening/afternoon.
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Anyway what prompted this response is ...I know we are 'way okay' as family. I am actually thinking with a clearer head, because this happened today as I looked over and had time too, and actually really LOOKED over my bank statement and wondered when and why my insurance had went up 40 bucks a month?
What?
I had not been writing down an extra 40 bucks missing from my account through automatic draft. ....So, I went out to the garage pulled the month by month statement that I had filed out there and low and behold how about in June LOL!!! When we bought a new VAN... "hey dumbo, wake up... get your head out of the sand, it is time!". At least I am thinking clearly NOW, and am now more relaxed around here, and have found time to be in control of me and myself and THINK about my duties... OMG!! At least I found out before the checks bounced :o) ... I have been able to take time to do budgets, [as you hear me moan and sound off to you all; my good friends] I can now think and have found a few mistakes that had been left unattended to, ...due to adoption crisis's first ... & me and myself last.
...awhh at least we are finally seeing normal around here. Now, not every moment is that perfect essence, but pretty darn close. But hey, it wouldn't be 'normal' if it were all roses without manure~sometimes! We are Happy & Hangin' in there.
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Happy "Forever Family Day" S and A and momma too!;-)
We love you!
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